Oops, guess I made a social faux pas when I asked if Squidman can go to a wedding when he wasn’t invited. Don’t make the same mistake I did! Double check here first.
Look closely at the envelope in which the invitation came. To whom is it addressed?
* If it is addressed to only you: your hosts expect you to attend the wedding alone. They will no doubt attempt to seat you with other single people and/or acquaintances of yours. As the wedding date approaches, you might ask the couple if other mutual friends who have been invited solo, then arrange to arrive at the wedding with them. This might be particularly desirable if you are a single woman attending an evening wedding and have any qualms about not having an escort for the event.
* If it is addressed to you “and Guest”: your hosts intend for you to invite the date of your choice. Make your plans immediately and, when you send your response card, indicate your guest’s name (write clearly!) so that they can personalize your date’s place card, if they are to be used.
* If it addressed to you and your significant other: your hosts intend for just the two of you to attend. If you have children as well, sorry, but they aren’t invited. Take no offense. Your children are no doubt lovely and well-behaved. It just may not be a child-oriented event. Try to remember that this is the couple’s special day, and perhaps children don’t readily fit into the picture they have of their dream wedding. Instead of taking umbrage, find a sitter and enjoy yourselves. Be sure to indicate exactly how many of you are attending when you send your response card (if only one of you can attend, make sure that is indicated clearly, so the hosts can plan accordingly).
* If it addressed to you and your significant other (if you have one), and then indicates your children’s names as well: then you are all welcome. This is also the case if it says “and children” or “and family” after your names, or if it is addressed to “The Your Name Family”. Again, when you send your response card, indicate exactly who is attending so to facilitate the hosts’ planning and creation of place cards, etc.
It is not appropriate to ask the couple or the hosts to let you bring extra people, even your children. If the exclusion of your children is such a problem that you can not attend without them, simply send your regrets, saying that family matters prevents you from being able to attend, and leave it at that.